2022- In Gratitude and Forgiveness
2022- In Gratitude and Forgiveness
The world is a complex and ever-changing place, full of challenges and
difficulties that can sometimes seem insurmountable. However, as Chinua
Achebe wrote in his famous novel “Things Fall Apart,” ‘The world has no
end, and what is good among one people is an abomination with others.’ In
other words, the challenges we face are not unique to our time or our place. Throughout history, people have faced adversity and struggled to find meaning and purpose in the face of hardship.
As we look back on the past year, it is important to remember the loved ones we have lost and to honour their memories. Of special and constant mention is my dear mother Christy, who died years ago but whose memories I shall forever continue to cherish and keep alive. I had an interesting conversation with my dear friend Tolu towards the end of the year discussing how I feel like my dear mother’s face have begun to elude me. I am always struggling to recollect her face or remember what she sounded like, so I find myself looking for her pictures to keep that smile and face etched in my memory. This just reminds me that our place on earth or even in the world is so fragile. Like I expressed in a previous essay “Who Fears Death”, I believe the real death has just begun- the death of memories after our physical deaths.
It is also important to recognize the ways in which we have adapted and
persevered in the face of adversity, and to draw strength and inspiration
from these experiences. As we move into 2023, let us hold onto hope and
strive to create a brighter future for ourselves and for those around us.
Together, we can navigate the challenges ahead and create a world that is
more compassionate, just, and equitable for all.
As we begin the year, below are two guiding principles that I have tried to
live my life by over the past few years and why. Perhaps you may find some
use of these two.
On Forgiveness
“The world has no end, and what is good among one people is an abomination with others.”
The world is a complex and ever-changing place, full of challenges and
difficulties that can sometimes seem insurmountable. It is natural to feel
hurt and angry when we are wronged by others, but forgiveness is a crucial part of moving forward and finding peace within ourselves.
I was faced with a situation in October 2022 where I was deeply wronged by a person of authority. I am thankful that I had the courage and grace to
forgive him and move on with my life. It was difficult I must confess, it was very difficult. Forgiveness can be difficult and may require time and effort, especially in cases of deep hurt or betrayal. But it is a choice that we can make for our own well-being and happiness. By forgiving, we can release ourselves from the burden of anger and bitterness and find a sense of freedom and liberation.
Forgiveness can also help us to heal and move forward in a positive
direction, creating the opportunity for growth and renewal. One of my
biggest lessons on forgiveness was found in the pages of a Buddhist book I
picked up years ago after my first vipassana meditation experience.
“Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person
to die.” — Buddha
The act of holding onto anger and resentment towards another person
causes us more harm than it does to the person we are angry with. By
carrying these negative emotions, we poison our own minds and hearts,
causing ourselves suffering and preventing ourselves from finding inner
peace and happiness. By practicing forgiveness and letting go of anger, we
can find freedom and liberation from suffering.
The Buddha taught that forgiveness is not just an act of kindness towards
others, but also a way to heal ourselves. By letting go of negative emotions,
we can release ourselves from the burden of anger and bitterness and find a sense of freedom and liberation. Forgiveness allows us to approach life with a sense of balance and perspective, rather than being swayed by the highs and lows of our circumstances. It helps us to respond to difficult situations with wisdom and compassion, rather than reacting with anger or
frustration. By cultivating forgiveness, we can find a sense of peace and
contentment that is not dependent on external circumstances.
In addition to the personal benefits of forgiveness, it is also important to
recognize the role it can play in creating a more just and compassionate
society. It helps to create a culture of understanding and compassion, rather than one of hostility and division. By practicing forgiveness, we can
contribute to the creation of a world that is more loving and harmonious.
When we forgive others, we model forgiveness and encourage others to do
the same. Overall, holding a grudge is pointless. Forgive.
On Gratitude
Gratitude fills my heart like a warm and bright flame. It reminds me of the
good and helps me let go of regrets. It helps me to see the beauty and joy in
the world and in others. Gratitude gives me strength to face each day with
grace. It helps me to find peace in even the toughest place. So, I will hold
onto gratitude, like a precious, shining gem.
I like to think of gratitude as the act of expressing appreciation and
thankfulness for the things we have and the people who have helped us
along the way. It is a powerful and transformative practice that can bring us
joy and fulfilment and help us to cultivate a positive outlook on life.
Gratitude helps us to focus on the positive aspects of our lives and to find joy and fulfilment in the present moment. By actively identifying and focusing on the things we are grateful for, we can shift our focus away from the negative and find a sense of contentment and satisfaction in our lives.
Another benefit of gratitude is that it can strengthen our relationships and
connections with others. When we express appreciation and thanks to
others, we build stronger bonds and create an environment of kindness and generosity. Gratitude can also foster a sense of community and belonging, as it helps us to recognize and appreciate the contributions of those around us.
In addition to the personal benefits of gratitude, it is also important to
recognize the role it can play in creating a more compassionate and just
society. By expressing gratitude and appreciation to those around us, we can foster a sense of empathy and understanding and contribute to the creation of a more loving and harmonious world.
Overall, gratitude is a practice that can bring us joy, fulfilment, and a sense
of connection with others. It is a simple yet powerful way to find happiness
and contentment in our lives and to create a more positive and
compassionate world.
In conclusion, the past year has been a time of both challenges and victories. It has been a year of great change and adaptation, as we have had to navigate unprecedented circumstances and find ways to come together and support one another. While there have been many difficulties and
hardships, there have also been moments of hope and resilience that have
inspired us to persevere.
As we look back on the past year, it is important to remember the lessons we have learned and the ways in which we have grown. We can take these
lessons with us into the future, as we continue to navigate the challenges
that lie ahead. As we move forward, let us be grateful for the lessons of the
past and the strength and resilience that has gotten us through.
3rd January 2023 leaves the year still very much pregnant. Forgiveness and
Gratitude are the two key lifestyles I would love to share with you. I hope I
can progress in living a life that reflects them. I hope you have a wonderful
2023.
